I'm just Lexie...

GOT A JOB! At JCPenney. GO ME!




That's all.

This whole not being able sleep thing is getting ridiculous.

You're amazing.


THE END.

So puppy isn't feeling good and it makes me really sad because he's throwing up all the time. I get the results from his blood test sometime today, and the wait is killing me. I hope he's ok and nothing major is going on. We think he ate something he wasn't supposed to, he sticks everything in his mouth, it's so ridiculous. I love him nonetheless.

EDIT: Got the blood tests back and he's going to be ok. He has to go on a special diet for a few days but it's ok.

I guess we're friends now? I don't know why because you're such an asshole to me. Let's see how this goes. Yeah?

Aj is absolutely amazing to me, he treats me so well. Something I'm not use too. I'm afraid I'm going to fuck it up somehow because I always find a way to do that. He is being so understanding of everything that's going on and it's nice to have someone that likes to listen to what I have to say, and never wants me to just shut up. He doesn't ever get tired of me and what I have to say, and he doesn't just tolerate me, he actually cares. I'm so incredibly blessed to have him. I never wanted to get married, but now that I have him it seems like a possibility.

I'm so tired of family stuff, I feel like everything is ripping us apart. I hate that my family can't go a day without fighting about something, I just want peace already. Is that too much to ask? I wish there was something I could do to help us financially, but getting a job has proven to be absolutely impossible. I hate this feeling of helplessness.

I miss everyone so much and it hurts me that I'm not as close with people like I was in high school. I look back on all the fun times we had and it just makes me want to cry. I need to hang out with people more because I just feel like a hermit. I never want to go out. Maybe I'm depressed.

College is going good, I planned everything out academically and I'm going to attend San Bernadino soon, hopefully. [: I'm so excited. I'm getting good grades and that's something that doesn't happen me too often.

Cousins are coming this weekend. YAY!

Cousins come over this weekend, I'm so excited. [:

You could be the one. <3

I'm completely and totally in love with you, and I hope I never do something so stupid as to mess things up. Aj wrote a paper on me for English and printed a copy for me to keep. It's so sweet. [:

I miss Sara, Marty, and Caro like crazy. I need to hang out with all of you soon.

I went to lunch with Zach today and it was so much fun, I've really missed that kid and it was nice catching up. We've decided we're going to become close again and go to awesome parties and get completely shitfaced. It will be amazing. [:

I turn 21 in 4 months on Thursday, I can't wait to get older. Haha. As weird as that sounds. I'm not going to become an alcoholic or anything, but it would just be nice to have more freedom. [:

I thought I missed you, but I only missed some things of you. Plus, the fact that your new-found friendship with my ex pisses me off. It's none of my business who hangs out with, and I'm just going to stop talking about you altogether.

I really need to stop talking to you, I especially need to stop hanging out with you. You've done really crappy things to me and the fact that I continuously forgive you and let you back into my life is just plain stupid on my part. I need to kick you out, for once and for all.

I think I might get the job at Joanns, I really hope I do.

I'm kind of sleep deprived right now, maybe I should go to bed. Goodnight.

I'm so lost, I don't even know what to do with myself anymore. I hate you, I hate you for everything you do to me, I hate myself even more for letting you do this to me. I should just kick you out of my life but I'm too forgiving of a person for that. I still hang out with you, I still talk to you, and sometimes I still care about you. In reality, I want nothing to do with you but I feel like I owe you something, even with all the hurt you've caused me. You're toxic and I should know better than to trust you. I'm trying to tell myself I can go on without you, that I don't need you as a friend, and somehow I can't do it. I'm pathetic and I wish I was a stronger person, but I'm a push-over and I need to change that. I need to stick up for myself because no one else should have too. I hate you Dave, I hate you...

There are a few things I have to say. so bear with me here...

First off, everything is going amazing with AJ and I couldn't be happier. I can't explain how nice it is to finally found someone who I can be myself around and who actually loves me for me, and on top of that treats me with the respect I deserve.

I'm so tired of the money problems in our house and how I can't contribute to it because I have no job, I'm looking but no success.

Lisa, I really miss you and I wish we could be friends even though I know that'll never happen. I just wish we could try, but yet again that'll never happen.

Dave is driving me nuts and I wish and thought all that drama was over with, I was wrong.

I'm doing really good in school so that makes me happy. Go me!

Sara I miss you like crazy and every time we hang out it's as if we're picking up where we last left off. I need more Sara time for sure.

I miss Marty too and we're going to make it a habit to do Starbucks once a week so that we can catch up and whatnot. [:

That's all I guess, I'll think of more later because my puppy is ready to go to bed now.

I hate this, I hate you, but I can't stay away from you.












And I wish I had someone to talk to about this...

I might as well just end it, I hate this feeling.

So I don't know what's going on with you and I but it seems like you're mad at me for liking someone that I asked you permission for if it was ok. This really hurts me. I guess that's all I have to say.

So to all of you who actually read this I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while, I've just been to busy to get around to it. So the updates:


I shouldn't be hanging out with Dave because he's a complete asshole and what he has done is unforgivable. Too bad he has me wrapped around his little finger and I'll do whatever he tells me. Damn for being a pushover.


I'm so glad to be back in California, I've missed you all so much, you don't even know. It's so nice to be in a place where I'm wanted and loved. Thank you all.


It has been a while since I've talked about liking another boy, and the days has finally come. He's not the usual guy I date (asshole), and I'm overjoyed about it. He's just so awesome it's unreal and we're going to a bonfire later tonight, since technically it's Sunday morning. Well I'll update more on him as it progresses. [:


Unpacking has been a nightmare and I just want it to all be done. It has brought me a lot closer with my parents though which is awesome.


Well that's all... Oh yeah, go to Jack's show on Tuesday at Chain and Chad's show on Friday at Whiskey a Go Go. [:

I let you do something incredibly stupid to me and now I HAVE to pay the consequences. You pissed me off so I'm telling your parents and mine, good job asshole.

Everyone, I'm stupid.

I don't mean much to you.

I'm just a drama queen.

It sucks that I still love you, to think that you still cared. I'm so stupid.

Only 5 more days until I vacation in California.


Oh yeah... I MOVE BACK TO CALIFORNIA IN AUGUST!!! [:

I guess we're friends now even though I said we wouldn't be anymore.


I come June 22nd - 29th so mark your calendars friends. [: 20 more days!!!


My sister has the baby in like 5 and half hours!!! :D

I think you're an asshole, that's all.

Got a new tattoo, that's about it. Picture is on facebook and myspace.

I start serving today too!

I let my jealousy get the best of me and it wasn't even true. Damn, I hate being this way.

I start waitress training next week and I can't wait. I'm only making 6.55 an hour but I'll make bank on tips.

I'm taking a semester off so I can save up money for school, and I'll be moving back to Cali in December for sure! So only a few more months guys. I'm also visiting soon and I can't wait to hang out with all of you. My schedule is like jam-packed and I'm stoked! I love having people care about me because honestly, I thought no one really did. I love you all. [: <3

Life is good and I really can't complain, I actually like being single. [:

Yesterday was nice and weird all at the same time, we talked like all day and you really seemed to enjoy it. Some of the stuff we talked about was awkward but for the most part it was like you really cared. I can't wait to come to California, I hope it doesn't fall through. If I do come it's May 24 - June 2, and I want to see all of you. That means Aundrey, Amy, Carolyn, Dave, Marty, and Sara for the most part. Even Laura, Sam, and others. I can't wait, please let this happen for me.